Sigh... Can't have a good night sleep again... It seems a very very long time where I do not have dreams or nightmares at night. These factors are things that do not bring your body to rest at night. In fact, they adds fatigue and it causes you to be tired on the next day. Like now, I'm feeling sleepy although I had 8 hours of sleep, which a needed rest by any person. Hmm, if you asked me what I was dreaming, I would not be able to answer you as I immediately forgotten them as soon as I'm awake. It's a mystery, why some dreams that you made are forgotten once you are awake, and nightmares are usually remembered, but of course, there are times where you suddenly woke up, finding your heart beating very fast and didn't know what had happened.
I found out something yesterday. My mom also hates weapon developments. Yesterday my dad was watching some documentary about weapons, me for course, I'm not really interested. My mom walked to the hall and saw the show and started saying "why people keep creating such dangerous weapons and killing innocent people?" Well guess there's someone around me who agrees to it too. I don't really like the way how NS was phrased as. My friend from another country perceive NS as a independent course to make one mature. But, the reason my country used was to defend the country. "If enemy attacks us, we give them 2 times the damage" I heard this from a teacher or a textbook, I can't really recall. If everyone was like this, there would be a forever war in the world, forever revenging, forever killing, annihilating own kind. I think prophecy on when human kind would extinct would probably not be due to natural resources or any other reasons, but due to our folly. Yes, I'm afraid of guns, if possible, I won't even want to hold a real gun in my whole entire life, but seems reality is impossible, entering NS means wielding guns, practicing it(Although I won't mind bows, using it as a purpose of a aiming game).
Oh ya, if you are wondering why I did not continue with my Japanese lessons here, is because i stopped reading the book. Since there are a lot of points in the book which I don't understand, it's better if i leave it to me sensei to teach me. Talking about Japanese, I was searching about Sakura(Cherry blossom tree). From an anime information, Sa represents a god, I can't really remember which god, and kura means sit. So literally, Sakura meant the god sitting. I came across an interesting festival yesterday. It was "Hanami". It's something where you are your friends/spouse/gf/bf come together to walk pass a Sakura park or to eat under it, enjoying the falling Sakura petals. I think it should be a very wonderful sight, as beautiful as falling snow. One day, I hope to participate in Hanami and personally experience these falling Sakura scenes.
Tee hee hee, as usual, I also completed an anime yesterday morning at around 2-3 Am. It was a romance/magic anime named Kamisama Kazuko. I've learnt that in every angelic heart there is devil in it, it's just that the good are more than the evil, while in every devilish heart, there's an angel in it, just that evil and more than the good. The difference of an angel and a devil is only differentiated by a thin line. One can cross between good or bad anytime, it all depends on how one wants.
2 days from now, 2 scary tests! T_T. OC2 and my BFA tests. I'm not really ready for my BFA, but as for my OC2, I do not have much confidence even though I studied. It seems that the information I memorise escapes from my mind everytime when I put down the paper, oh well...
But, I'm kind of sick of my course now. In semester 1, I still had the motivation to study hard for my tests and exam, but now, it seems I'm just forcing myself to study as tests and exam are nearing, this is probably the reason on my the information can't get into my brain since I'm losing interest in it. Someone help meT_T.
At the same time, I'm getting bored about my CCA. It's like.... We new people are treated as extras, and also when we tried to play in whole, the people has high expectations of us when we didn't really receive alot alot of training. I feel like quitting the CCA and join another 1, probably Japanese Club. But my classmate said that the CCA is based on event. As in when there's no event, there's no CCA. Kind of disappointing, I wan to commit myself to a CCA which suits my interests.
Actually I wanted to add something before I end this post, but seems I don't feel like letting others know this private feelings of mine. For your information, I use my blog as a medium to organise my thoughts, thats is if anyone wonder what kind of blogger I am.
I think I shall stop here for today, see ya all next time, bye!
